Write Your Own Obituary — Sobering to Say the Least!

Because life is uncertain and I’m headed for surgery in 11 eleven days, tonight I wrote my own obituary.

 

It was a sobering exercise, let me tell you!

 

Now I suggest everybody do it.

 

I wrote it because I’m usually the one tapped to write the obits in my family (being the resident professional writer) and because no one in my family knows me well enough to know what I’d want said about my legacy when I croak.

 

I know for a fact I’d most likely be mis-gendered, because no one in my family will acknowledge or verbalize my preferred pronouns. (Perhaps they will after my chest is masculinized; I can kind of understand why they might feel uncomfortable–or forget–referring to me as he/his/him right now. I hope so!)

 

They also haven’t ever inquired about my career or pastimes, so they won’t remember to mention my activism in social justice and animal advocacy, and since they’re mostly Republicans, they surely wouldn’t mention my progressive political endeavors.

 

I know they love me, but they don’t “get” me any more than I “get” them. Having them put something together as an obit would have me spinning in my grave, I feel quite confident about that!

 

I’ve sent my sisters copies of it and my best friend, Lisa, too. I’ve given her permission to adapt/add to it as she sees fit, because nobody knows what they mean to other people, so it’s more or less a first draft that establishes I’m a trans man with a legacy that spans several highlighted and diverse activities: writer, working in Hollywood, volunteering at animal sanctuaries, engaging in politics and protests…

 

I’m NOT going to print it here. Lisa can put it here when the time comes, and on my FB page, which (as I told her) I don’t expect will come for quite a few more years!

 

But having written it, I truly encourage you to write your own obituary. It won’t be easy! But it will be worth it to look in on yourself as though your “dash” (birth date – death date)  has finally arrived and you have no further ability to alter what happened during the dash.

 

I wrote it straight, the way a reporter would. I might write it again in a few days the way a humorist would. Because I’m humorous by nature (except during pandemics and political seasons!) and leaving readers with a grin would be something I could live (and die) with,  too!

 

We’ll see!

 

In the meantime, give your own obituary a try. I promise you it’s an exercise you won’t soon forget!

 

 

P.S. And if you’d like to “add” to mine, submissions are welcome! (Why wait ’til I’m dead to say what you thought of me!) But be brief, like one or two lines, max! Maybe I’ll add your quote to what I have! You just never know!!!