More Answers to Questions About Myself

More Answers to Questions About Myself

 

I received a small handful of new questions today. (Thanks again, Hannah!) They’re deeper and more in depth. EXACTLY what I was looking for when I asked!

 

1.) In one of your books, you said you gave De (actor DeForest Kelley) a card that said that you wanted to be just like him when you ‘grew up.’ As someone who knew him well and was one of his closest friends, what does being like De mean to you that it might not mean to the rest of us?

 

De was the quintessential gentleman. He made everyone he encountered feel seen and beloved. He was patient and uncommonly kind. That’s what I mean when I said I wanted to be like him “when I grew up.” In fact, I consider being “grown up” (as a definition) people like DeForest Kelley and Mister Rogers. I’ve known a few others, but you wouldn’t know their names. Most people never do grow up to the degree of becoming masters at cherishing others.

 

2.) If your parents hadn’t wanted you to be quiet, do you think you’d be an extrovert?

 

Definitely! I’m still hoping to find some way to resurrect that quality!

 

If so, what about a writer? 

 

Yes, I would still probably be a writer, but also probably an actor and a well-known, influential speaker. (Writing is show business for shy/introverted people.)

 

Are you grateful for what they (my parents) did? 

 

I’m grateful for much of what they did, but not this particular thing or the fact that they tried to discourage me from becoming a writer. When your parents think you’re on the wrong track, it’s a lot to overcome because kids want their parents to be proud of them.

 

(P.S. Not long before he died, Dad told me he was proud of me because I ignored him and went ahead with what I wanted to do anyway. I was working at Warner Bros. then. He always said I had my head in the clouds, wanting to do things most people never got to do. Unfortunately, neither of my parents lived long enough to see me making it as a professional copy/content/features writer or even as an author. I wrote only one book while they were alive: LET NO DAY DAWN THAT THE ANIMALS CANNOT SHARE, and Dad paid to have it published where I worked at a print shop in Tacoma. I have since had it professionally published with some added stories about my life and times with various animals, tame and captive wild. You can read some of them at krisandkritters.com.)

 

3.) What are some of your strengths and weaknesses?

 

My strengths can also be my weaknesses.

 

I’m determined, which means I can become bull-headed if I’m not careful.

 

I’m an idealist, which (again) means I can become bull-headed when someone tries to talk me into being more “sensible” or “reality-based”.  (I LOVE MAN OF LA MANCHA.  I am Don Quixote but my brains haven’t dried up yet–I know when I’m jousting windmills!)

 

I’m empathetic, which can get me in trouble, as reported in the last blog post.

 

I’m punctual, which can mean waaaayyyy too early when someone expects me to arrive at a particular time.

 

I’m deferential, which can cause me to fade into the woodwork when I should stand up, stand out, and respond in concrete terms and without equivocation.

 

I’m well read (I’ve read thousands of books and probably tens of thousands of articles), which can make me come across like an arrogant “know it all” to people who aren’t equally committed to life-long improvement and education.

 

That’s what popped up immediately. If I think of more, I’ll add them later.

 

4.) Leonard Nimoy did a project called “Secret Selves” where he took photos of people being who they truly are on the inside. One guy wanted to live in the woods away from society so he covered himself in mud. Another wanted to be a kid, so they wore a dinosaur onesie. If someone was doing that today, what would  your secret self be?

 

I’m one of very few people who “outed” my secret self a few years ago. I’m a heterosexual, celibate trans guy.  Always have been, always will be.  Those who deny it or refuse to believe it are being obtuse or are frightened, neither of which serves them.

 

I’m not scary. I’m who I’ve always been. It’s just that I started revealing it by way of writing WOMB MAN three years ago (TO HELP LOVED ONES UNDERSTAND WHAT TRANS FEELS LIKE, AND SO KIDS STOP KILLING THEMSELVES BECAUSE THEY THINK THEY’RE ALL ALONE IN THE WORLD), chest masculinization surgery this past August, and super short hair ever since COVID came. (I cut my own hair now!)

 

5.) How do you see yourself as a person?  As a thoughtful, sensitive individual with a seriously strong B.S. detector. My intuitive abilities are epic.

 

When you look in the mirror, what do you see? I still see my younger self.  (I’m almost 70, but I can’t “see” that except for some gray hair. I have very few wrinkles and not much turkey neck sag.)

 

I see a happy, generally satisfied, energetic human being.

 

(But, to tell you the truth, I don’t look in the mirror much.  I look in a mirror when I brush my hair or teeth, and when I want to look at my new chest! And I look at my new chest more often than I look at any other feature these days. LOVE my chest!)

 

6.) What do you think is your greatest accomplishment? 

 

There are two. I won’t even try to choose the greatest one because I can’t.

 

•  Caring for DeForest Kelley at the end of his life. This opportunity to at least partially repay him for the decades of care he showered on me was one of my life’s greatest gifts, even though it was VERY HARD. Watching a loved one decline and die isn’t for the faint of heart or spirit. It takes a toll!

 

•  The many millions of words I’ve put out in the English language while in service to my clients, readers and my own legacy.

 

IF (big IF!) I was born for a reason, it was to communicate caring.